Our kids may sometimes have mood swings and tantrums. We find it difficult to manage their emotions in some situations because we don’t exactly what they want. If our kids are upset, then we are getting pushed as if they don’t want to see us. But if we ignore them and let them do what they want, they become more upset because we don’t care. Isn’t it confusing to understand how they feel about something?
Kids are sometimes upset, but they didn’t utter it in words. Instead, they are straightforward to showcase their feelings towards unusual actions. When we respond to them since they need help, then there are some instances that they get irate. We are getting confused to know the exact answers to their problems.
In many years living under one roof, we know that are some reasons why our kids act that way. They might not want to talk to us when they are upset directly. It might be because of the following reasons:
• They are quite overwhelmed to utter any word when they feel mad.
• They want to keep us from not being hurt because of their negative emotions.
• They are angry with us and are not sure how to handle things because they know that we love them so much.
We, as parents, are sometimes being hurt by how our kids respond to situations. That’s why we always tend to understand their feelings in different ways. In this situation, we think of the best ways to handle the situations by giving better connections with their feelings. For us, it is a better opportunity to extend our love, care, and understanding to them since they badly needed positive vibes in these hard times.
If we think that our kids are upset, we should prolong our patience and never get upset. As much as possible, let’s completely understand what they want to convey since they can hardly express their feelings.
To better understand what our kids feel, here are the lists of 4 things upset kids want but may not tell us. By knowing these things, then we can pro-actively respond to their needs and wants.
1. “Please listen and give additional attention a little longer” – One of the requests of our kids from us to give more time and attention while listening to what is happening to them. Even though the answers to their problems are obvious, we should know when to listen to what they say prior to providing some pieces of advice and remedies to their problem. Sometimes, our kids need someone to talk to and a listening parent who’s always there supporting their decisions. Well, it can be understood that some parents may be working full-time, so finding time for their children can be challenging. However, such situations may necessitate hiring a nanny or an au pair (you can visit https://www.goaupair.com/host-families/au-pairs-vs-nanny-vs-daycare/ to know more about the differences between a nanny and an au pair) who can stay at your home and engage your children while you are away.
2. “Please never give up when I’m upset” – The majority of the kids today are quite confusing in terms of their moods and personalities. Perhaps we already experienced that are being shut out by our kids while slamming the doors. Kids are straightforward to do this reckless actuation, but they really didn’t intend to hurt us. If this thing happens, let’s show them that we never give up caring or loving them. We are always here, even though they push us away from them. Even though they say harsh words that they really don’t intend to, let’s be conversational and let them feel that they can depend on us once needed.
3. “Please always see the goodness in me” – Some of our kids are worried because they feel that we are being disappointed to them whenever they did something wrong. They might also worry because they think that we see them as “bad kids.” So, during this situation, let’s not condemn our kids whenever they did something wrong. I’m not saying that we should tolerate their bad actuation. What I’m trying to pinpoint is that we need to educate them about what they did. This could be one of the best parenting approaches that we can do to our kids.
4. “Please trust me in working this out” – Our kids need a little push and support based on what they want to do or solve. While the quality of their problem differs from ours, the quantity of stress they take is usually the same. They may want you to have faith in them when they are attempting difficult textbook problems or in cases as simple as learning how to tape a hockey stick. It would be better to give them more time to analyze and provide solutions to the problems. If they badly needed our help, then that’s the time that we will engage in the situations.
These are the things that upset kids want, but they may not tell you exactly what they want. So, as parents, we should know when to interrupt, when to push our kids to surpass their limits, and when to extend our help to them.